Thursday, March 31, 2005

physician heal thy self...

i'm feeling very bad today

another cat came in to play

eating all my food; speaking very crude

he went on to spoil the mood

the wool is over everyone's eyes

but i didn't pull nothing

didn't try

i'm just sitting here waiting for the brilliant sun

radiant guiding light upon everyone

he's got it all together - got it all together now

just better be quiet and let him be

somebody will see

it won't be me

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Wednesday, March 30, 2005

nobody home

you can look into my face and guess what - you'll see a big empty space stretching out as far as the eye can see...

upon that distant horizon is a dot which upon closer examination is the prehistoric stagasaurus dinosaur

receipt of attack by the abominable tyrannosaurus rex wields an explosion so fierce and powerful that time itself is forever changed

i hurt

we want the world and we want it...




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Monday, March 28, 2005

Osama-Rama Once More

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Sunday, March 27, 2005

happy easter

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Friday, March 25, 2005

where the $#*! is osamer?

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Thursday, March 24, 2005

Reality and the perceptions therein...

Would you say that reality is a coping mechanism for humans? Personally, i feel that time definitely is, hence my proclivity to never wear watches. Nonetheless, I do keep aware of the time on my cell phone - who needs to be overaccessorized in order to function like a so-called "real human being?" I for one, do, but that's because I have a "kick-ass business plan" that requires me to don numerous technological enhancements at all times.

As for the state of my mind... I appreciate the concerns of my "friends" that have forced me to slow down and develop my strategies a little more firmly. The two weeks following my last housewarming debacle were definitely a cold shower that I needed, although the derailing aspects of this intervention leave little to be desired. Ultimately, I am an optimist and look at the situation with a degree of inevitability, however, lessons learned the hard way are destined not to be repeated. And that includes the company i keep.

i need a job

and then there's this...

b afraid.

b very afraid...

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Wednesday, March 23, 2005

where's osama?


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It happened like this...

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Sunday, March 20, 2005

Where IS osama?

day 5

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Saturday, March 19, 2005

After a brief hiatus...

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Thursday, March 17, 2005

goodbye chicago

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Wednesday, March 16, 2005

still at home with dad

seems i'm getting younger these days

but you're getting older...

without me


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Tuesday, March 15, 2005

at home spending time with dad

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Monday, March 14, 2005


the only universal truth is that there is no universal truth

only perceived truth


so shut the fuck up

and leave me




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Wednesday, March 09, 2005

where's osama?

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Tuesday, March 08, 2005


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what happened saturday night

please let the issue die

here and



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Monday, March 07, 2005

day 1

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Sunday, March 06, 2005

i am ok

hello all. i am sorry for raising the level of concern for me to "high alert." i have spoken with both my mother, father and step-dad (RICH) at this point and have agreed, per their request, to see a psychiatrist to talk about what is happening here. It can't hurt - i'm no stranger to therapy - and if i find it beneficial, i will continue to see the shrink and even consider going on meds to help stabilize my manic swings.

Unfortunately, I don't think I'll be spending too much time at the therapists, as the wheels are all in motion on the triple threat of PSS/135G/KILLER. The pieces are falling into place with a remarkable and disconcerting ease and I know I'm not the only one who is feeling a little rattled and scared with the prospect of the revolutionary success I envision for these projects.

Know this... I am not god. I am not stable. I need help.

While this sounds like, well... a plea for help, it is. I need help to keep me grounded and focussed on the matter at hand, and to be reminded when a situation that I purport to have no control over could be easily remedied with a simple intervention. I regret and deeply apologize to you all for any inconvience I may have caused...

But the fact is also this - I'm 31. My ex is 20. And I went through this once before only with a sorry lack of success to account for it. What's happening now is entirely different, as my perspective on this, as i perceived it, a "test." It was the scariest test of my life and I passed it with flying colors. I took what was a re-tread on the road of "Uh. oh... M has taken too many drugs and thinks he's god again" to networking with the hospital staff, playing my cards as close to the chest as I could, and finding that everyone was interested in this project and, for some reason, absolutely believed that KILLER is already a reality. It's only now a reality in my head exclusively, but that will change soon enough.

Please call or write me as I do need help in this transitional phase into the next level of life: better :). And the beauty of my biz plan is really and truley that everybody wins. So please please all hands on deck, and let's do some art.


PS - The deciding moment to call 911 was when I began to run upstairs towards the roof with a ladder. Everyone thought (and reasonably so enough) that I was ready to jump. The reality of the situation is that I was getting ready to project the powerpoint presentation on the roof that I had created while I was cooking an amazing dinner for our guests. Oooops!

PPS - Let's do it right this time. And hey - let's be careful out there.

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Friday, March 04, 2005

hello world

while maybe you won't necessarily get this

a sweet tooth full of love


and the other

music to the ears

nice! watch me chaaaaaannggge
(pronounced CH'AAAAAA'NNNNN'GE)

and best

be my friend


im happy
really happy
even here

and most unexpected still...

i see...
dead people

(that's a good thing)

from now on

dreams come true




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Thursday, March 03, 2005

drunk pony


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Wednesday, March 02, 2005

pony karaoke


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